Church Slams "Satanic" Video Game


Mud news


"Skeleton Escape" Lad in "GM Water" Row


"Kids Might Smell" Says Scientist


Travel News

« Prev 10
News Home
News Archive
Discuss this Story
Translate this Story for Non-English Speakers
RSS feed


Sunday 12th Jun 1983

requested by D. Tennison of Lancashire

with the Reverend Daniel O'Shelves
the Reverend Daniel o'Shelves

"I'm in love with a solopsist but she doesn't know I exist."

Woman Sues Over "Big Legs" Slur

06.02.02 10:30:55 GMT Reporter: Chris McTree

An American woman has been awarded eight hundred and sixty two billion four thousand seven hundred and fifteen million nine hundred and thirty one thousand seven hundred and forty one dollars compensation for being told that she had "big legs".

Pin money: Lady's legs legally little
Ms Chudney Stravinski, a self employed door to-door freelance new-age vegan aura channeler from (believe it or not) California claims that she suffered "emotional distress" and "negative aura fluctuations dis-harmonious with the natural energies of the Gaia earth mother goddess" after a shop assistant at a Santa Monica boutique stated that her legs were "too big" to fit into the lycra hot pants that she insisted on trying on.

Ms Stravinski's personal physician and analyst, Montague DeHuff MD, told the court that, far from having "big legs", Ms Stravinski actually suffered from "big legs syndrome" - a debilitating disorder in which the sufferer develops legs which are unusually "big".

The shop assistant, Miss Britney Slice, has been ordered to do twelve weeks' community service with the Californian UFO sky-watch scheme.


Top of page Send this page to most Lancastrians Archive Log Mailing list Contact